Kevin Garnett officially announced his retirement from the NBA earlier this week after 21 illustrious years. The Big Ticket broke into the league way back in 1995 and has spent more than half of his life playing in the NBA, bookended by stints with the Minnesota Timberwolves.
He retires as the Timberwolves franchise leader in nearly everything, from minutes played and total rebounds to personals fouls and free throw attempts. In addition to career averages of 17.8 points and 10 rebounds per game, the wily 40-year old veteran has also given us plenty of outstanding soundbites over the years.
Many of Garnett's best quotes likely took place while he was cursing himself out for missing a free throw, or trash talking another player on the court, yet what he said during pre & post game press conferences showcased the multi-layered character we came to know as KG.
Check out Garnett's retirement video below the stat sheet, and hit the slides for 10 of the most memorable quotes from his NBA career.
"I'm very simple. I'm not for the flashes, I'm not for glitz and glamour, you know. I just want to win, I want to be good at what I do, um, and look back upon these days of playing in the NBA. I want people to be able to say, or I want to be able to look at myself in the mirror and say I gave everything that I had and I enjoyed it while I was doing it."
- May 10, 2004 interview with Stephen A. Smith.
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"What the hell would I do? I don't have a barrage of dunks. I can barely jump. I'm not that creative. I just put the ball through the basket. Depending on how I feel, I might growl every now and then, but that's about it. I don't think people want to see that."
- Garnett on having never been invited to compete in the Dunk Contest
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"Millions of kids want to play pro basketball, and here I am getting the chance early. I learned one thing -- never hate a positive option."
- 1995, Garnett when asked where he hoped to be drafted
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"Timing is everything. Chemistry is something that you don't just throw in the frying pan and mix it up with another something, then throw it on top of something, then fry it up and put it in a tortilla and put in a microwave, heat it up and give it to you and expect it to taste good. You know? For those of you who can cook, y'all know what I'm talking about. If y'all can't cook, this doesn't concern you."
- December 2011, comparing the lack of preparation time before the lock-out shortened season to a microwaved burrito
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"I don't play to sweat, I play to win."
- April 4, 2006, after Timberwolves missed playoffs for a second straight season
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"This is it. It's for all the marbles. I'm sitting in the house loading up the pump, I'm loading up the Uzis, I've got a couple of M-16s, couple of nines, couple of joints with some silencers on them, couple of grenades, got a missile launcher. I'm ready for war."
- May 18, 2004, prior to Game 7 against the Sacramento Kings in Minnesota, with a trip to the Western Conference Finals on the line
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"Why else be in it? I'm not in anything for a short commitment. That's not me. That's not my makeup. I feel like if you're going to commit yourself, commit yourself wholeheartedly 1000%. Just because I'm going through a difficult time right now with the transition, that's not my makeup, that's not my speed. I'm not the type of person to give up just because something gets rough. That's a coward. That's not me."
- April 2006, when asked if he was in Minnesota for the "long haul"
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"You ever go to school and you had that bully mess with you every day? I know [reporters], ain't no tough guy here," said Garnett. "It's like that bully that you go to school every day and you know when you get out of your mom's or dad's car, you know you're going to see him as soon as you walk through the doors, he's sitting there waiting to pat your pockets and mess with you. Then one day you say, this is going to stop today.
"You walk in and as soon as he pats your pocket you lay his ass out and you see the expression on his face, and you're sort of kind of shook because, you know what, you just knocked the bully out and you don't know how he's going to come back. The next morning when you come in and he's not there, it's like a sigh of relief. It's like getting rid of the bully. It's like, I knocked the bully's ass out. I knocked his ass clean out. That's what it feels like. For y'all who ain't been bullied, y'all ain't got no idea what I'm talking about. But for y'all who have, you understand the story."
- June 18, 2008, comparing winning his first NBA title to knocking a bully out
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"I'll be Batman, I'll be Robin. I'll be anybody you want me to be. I'll be the Garbage Man."
- January 12, 2009 after win over Toronto
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"Playing for Doc is like coming home to a birthday cake, you know?" said Garnett. "Coming home to a birthday cake. Every day it's something you don't know -- it's going to be sprinkles, you know it's going to be sweet. You know it's going to be beautiful, but what you don't know is sometimes [they] might use too much salt in the recipe and you bite into the cake and get a salty taste. But you have to remember that every day is a birthday cake in here waiting on you. So if you can figure that riddle out, that's what it's like to play for Doc Rivers."
- On playing for Doc Rivers
KG Bonus
Bonus: "ANYTHING'S POSSIBLE!!!!" + More chemistry talk, comparing it to DVR.