We're a day away from Christmas, which means you have been subjected to the same five Christmas songs for the last 90 days.
Mariah is a national treasure, but if we have to hear "All I Want For Christmas Is You" again, we'll go to her Bel Air home and drop off all the dogs that have spent the last two decades panicking to Daydream. We know that some of you are with us.
Of course, you can't come out against Christmas songs in their entirety without ruining the mood of everyone around you and being labeled a grinch. So, we're offering an alternative.
What we've assembled here is the ten best Christmas songs that will never rub elbows with Irving Berlin.
Read on for the Top 10 Christmas Raps of all time.
Kanye West et. al - Christmas In Harlem
During the G.O.O.D. Fridays era, Kanye connected with Big Sean, Cam'ron, CyHi The Prynce, Teyana Taylor, Jim Jones, Vado and Musiq connected for the elaborate and festive record "Christmas in Harlem."
Kurtis Blow - Christmas Rappin'
It might sound corny now but Kurtis Blow's "Christmas Rappin'" was the first rap single ever released by a major label.
The song sold well and helped convince Mercury that they had made the right decision by signing Blow in 1979. He rewarded their trust by following up "Rappin'" with mega-hit "The Breaks."
Rev Run & The Christmas All Stars - Santa Baby
Kanye could have learned a thing or too from Rev Run. If you're going to gather a gang of all-stars on a single track, this is how you should do it. People aren't looking to be challenged with holiday music, the more familiar the melody is the better.
Not to mention the track manages to be a who's who of rap at the time: Snoop, P. Diddy, Ma$e, the list goes on. Fredro Starr wins the award for Angriest Verse on A Holiday Record.
HANUKKAH BREAK
Though the category of "Christmas rap" is decidedly slim pickings, our Jewish brothers and sisters have it so much worse. Hebrew heads have to settle for one of two songs.
Craig J - Dreidel Rap '89
A track that makes the original Dreidel song seem cool and transgressive or...
Too Short - Hanukkah (Favorite Time Of The Year)
A track where you can't tell if the man behind it is serious. Of course, spinning a track from the Bay Area legend is a tradition as time-honored as lighting the menorah - Some Jewish Guy in 2050, hopefully
Juice Crew All Stars - Cold Chillin' Christmas
Something about Christmas just brings out the posse cut, not that the folks behind "The Symphony" needed a reason.
Bonus points because you can put this one on around your grandparents and only get a partial side-eye.
Jim Jones - Ballin' On X-Mas
Real talk, this song is awesome. Easily the best song from the Dipset Christmas album, which was a real thing in case you blocked it out. Jim Jones isn't concerned with getting on Santa's good side but he does take the time to wedge in some "Jingle Bells" and "falalalala"s.
If you don't listen to this and think about how awesome the Dipset logo would be as a tree- topper, you need to reevaluate your life.
Ludacris - Ludacrismas
The only good thing to come from the absolutely terrible movie "Fred Claus." The "Southern Hospitality" meets "Here Comes Santa Claus" beat will make you wish that Luda soundtracked all those old Rankin-Bass specials.
KWANZAA BREAK
Kwanzaa is the only holiday less represented in rap than Hanukkah. Jay Elechannukah didn't even feel the need to mention it in "Exhibit C." The only Kwanzaa Rap we were able to uncover comes courtesy of Futurama.
Outkast - Player's Ball
Fun Fact: The 'Kast classic "Player's Ball" was originally released as a Christmas song on a LaFace Records Christmas compilation.
Because it's Big Boi and Three Stacks, it was still incredible.
Eazy-E - Merry Muthafuckin' Xmas
While it's definitely a festive track, it's also definitely not safe for family gatherings. Eazy easily wrote the filthiest song on this list, which is a shame because his Christmas pun game is leaps and bounds above everyone else.
Run-DMC - Christmas In Hollis
Here it is. The classic. The Christmas rap song by which all others are judged. Run-DMC dropped this one in 1987 and very few artists have been able to improve upon it. This song is so strong that it managed to reach number 13 on the Billboard charts...in 2000.
Unfortunately for these Xmas OG's, there's one song keeping them from the number one spot.
Snoop Dogg - Santa Claus Goes Straight To The Ghetto
Run-DMC has nothing on the golden pipes of Nate Dogg and G-funked sleigh bells. The standout track from the 1996 album Christmas On Death Row, "Santa" is one of the few holiday raps to truly earn its renown. It's not a good Christmas rap song. It's not a good Christmas song. It's a good song, period.