Before you get on to reading, I feel a responsibility as this list's writer to inform the reading public that marijuana is bad. If you smoke it, you will get pregnant and/or die.
That being said, if you do choose to smoke the devil's lettuce in honor of the Waldos, here are a few ground rules:
- DO NOT talk about the last time you were high. Soon enough, these conversations will degenerate into "Hey, remember the last time we talked about the last time we were high?"
- DO have a movie night.
- DO NOT try tightroping.
- DO listen to Freddie Gibbs & Madlib's Pinata.
- DO NOT listen to the new Young Money compilation album (this one applies to being sober as well).
- DO stock up on food.
- DO NOT forget when something's cooking. Only one thing in your home should be burning, and it shouldn't be your kitchen.
- DO check out the following list of stoner anthems.
- DO NOT bitch about who didn't make the cut.
- Hey, hey, hey...
- Smoke weed every day.
Afroman - "Because I Got High"
Afroman's only big hit (no pun intended) blazed up (okay, maybe pun intended) up the Billboard charts to a comfortable number 13 way back in 2000. Since then, the song has appeared in countless movie soundtracks and become the quintessential smoker's anthem. Not to mention that it scooped up a Grammy nomination for 'froman himself.
Bone Thugs N Harmony - "Weed Song"
Whether it's the first of the month or the last of the year, Bone Thugs make it abundantly clear on "Weed Song" that there's never a day you can't wake up (wake up, wake up, wake up) and bake up.
Curren$y - "Mary"
On it's own, the title "Mary" could mean a multitude of things. John Mayer's "Mary" would be a song about a girl-- most likely a beautiful one-- who makes the world seem brighter on the darkest days; Ginuwine's "Mary" might be about his home state of Maryland (just kidding, it would be about fucking); Curren$y's "Mary," however, requires no guessing game. Tune in.
Cypress Hill - "Hits from the Bong"
They may be critically acclaimed for their politically-charged lyricism, but, make no mistake, Cypress Hill have been and remain among hip-hop's most prolific stoners. "Hits from the Bong" is a classic.
Devin the Dude - "Doobie Ashtray"
Produced by DJ Premiere, this mellow track off of Devin the Dude's second album Just Tryin' to Live has stood the test of time. The Dude abides.
Dr. Dre - "Lets Get High"
Any number of Dre tracks could have found their way onto this list. But, this year, lets prepare for 4/20 with the most appropriately titled "Lets Get High." Featuring Kurupt, Hittman and Ms. Roq, this standout from 2001 didn't get the single treatment but-- for anyone who bought album-- it's almost impossible to skip.
Kid Cudi - "Day N Nite"
Cudi's breakout single still ranks among his best. "Day N Nite" branched out from Kanye's 808s & Heartbreak and carved itself into a new genre occupied of hip-hop occupied by only Cudder himself. The song would go on to be certified double platinum and would result in Cudi's signing to G.O.O.D. Music. It remains his biggest hit to date.
Kottonmouth Kingz - "Proud To Be A Stoner"
I believe this is the first time the Kottonmouth Kingz have been featured on HNHH so lets do a little bit of introduction before we jump into the track. Describing themselves as "psychedelic hip-hop punk rock," this Orange Country mainstay is more than a decade into the game with 13 studio albums and 4 tapes of unreleased material. Overall, their discography is hit or miss (it has to be with that kind of output), but every once in a while they strike gold. "Proud to be a Stoner" is one of those gems.
Ludacris - "Blueberry Yum Yum"
With a music video so "uncut" that it was only available on Ludacris's Red Light District tour DVD, "Blueberry Yum Yum" was a welcome change of pace for the typically animated emcee. Slurred and down-tempo, the song felt out of place on the album crammed between "Put Your Money" and "Child of the Night," but it feels just right with a side of the yum yum.
The Luniz - "I Got 5 On It (Bay Area Remix)"
According to Urban Dictionary (for those of us who aren't hip to 90's slang), "I got 5 on it" is a phrase meaning to pay half for a dime bag (a $10 bag of marijuana) with another person. It's also an astute description of the track's Bay Area remix. If the original wasn't potent enough, verses from E-40, Spice 1, Richie Rich, Shock G and Dru Down make this one the dankest track around.
Method Man & Redman - "How High"
From the classic stoner film of the same name, "How High" is an exercise in the punchline-driven stoner tradition pioneered by weed icons Cheech & Chong. This is the highest charting single for both Method Man & Redman individually as well as a duo. On a side note, just about every sentence in this list read as a pun and only a few of them are intentional.
Outkast - "Crumblin Erb"
There are a lot of theories out there as to why Outkast's return to the stage at Coachella was a disappointment. Maybe music has changed; maybe Andre just doesn't want to be involved with music anymore. If you asked me, the answer is simple: because "Crumblin' Erb" didn't make it into the set list. A standout track from a strandout album from a standout duo, this one doesn't get old.
Snoop Dogg, Wiz Khalifa & Bruno Mars - "Young, Wild & Free"
Off the soundtrack to their almost unwatchable feature film, Mac & Devin Go To High School, this hit single from hip-hop's two most iconic stoners tore up the charts and gave every college dorm room in America the unmistakable stench of "that sticky icky." Spin this as often as you want, just skip the movie.
Styles P - "Good Times (I Get High)"
One of the most played hip-hop singles of 2002, Style P's "Good Times" peaked at number 22 on the Billboard charts making it the artist's most successful single to date. Sampling "I Get High (On Your Memory)" by Freda Payne, the song interpolates the sample into its most literal meaning. Good times indeed.
50 Cent - "High All the Time"
He may not smoke himself, but Mr. Cent knows how to record a smash and "High All the Time" is just that. Years after this track was released, 50 would become one of the most outspoken advocates of "realness" in hip-hop, the results of which resulted in a long-term beef with Rick Ross. Why's it okay for 50 to lie about smoking but it's not okay for Ross to omit his job choices from his music? The world may never know. As long as their lies sound this hot, who cares?